Have I just been mansplained?

Mansplaining:  to explain something to a woman in a condescending way that assumes she has no knowledge about the topic.  Merriam-Webster Dictionary

Someone asked me recently “How do I know mansplaining when I see it?”  After all, not every situation in which a man explains something necessarily fits that definition.

Let’s begin with two scenarios:

Scenario A:  You are in a meeting and the topic of the university’s research strategy comes up.  You are fully up to speed on this and make a comment that you believe should help develop the strategy further.  Without drawing breath, Bob spends the next ten minutes taking you through it.

Scenario B: You are in a meeting and the topic of the university’s research strategy comes up.  You know nothing about it but do make a comment that you believe should help develop the strategy further.  Without drawing breath, Bob spends the next ten minutes taking you through it.

Are either of these scenarios mansplaining?  Or are they simply helpful support?

Kim Goodwin very usefully suggests there are three questions to ask that might help make that decision.  

Question 1: Do you want an explanation of something?  

As I launched my website this month, I was asking everyone and anyone if they knew how to edit or mail newsletters.  I have also been very happy to receive unsolicited explanations about the inner workings of websites.  I must admit I’ve got a tendency to information technology phobia.

Question 2: Is the person providing the explanation making assumptions about your capabilities or knowledge?  

When it comes to something I know about, my reactions can vary.  I might just be bored and thinking “Yes, yes I know”.  Those times are often when I can’t get a word in edgeways so I can push the conversation on.  

However, I well remember sitting in an executive meeting and getting seriously annoyed as the chap opposite explained – at length – how the Office for Students’ Teaching Excellence Framework (TEF) worked.  I was, at the time, a TEF panelist.  In fact, I was so irritated by his behaviour that I have to confess I tweeted about it that day.

The thing is, I could see by his demeanour that this chap thought he was being helpful.  Though - judging by the length of time he didn’t stop to draw breath - he was also rather enjoying showing off his knowledge. 

Was he mansplaining or not?  

This brings me to Kim Goodwin’s third question.

Question 3: How does bias and stereotyping impact on both of the above questions?  

There is a debate that the language of mansplaining is essentialist – in other words that certain characteristics are innate to specific groups of people.  For example, in this instance, all men talk down to women. 

The problem with being essentialist is that this statement is palpably not true.  We all know men who treat us as equals.  Indeed, women can also talk down to other women.  And men also talk down to other men.

However, the point of the term “mansplaining” is that it expresses something more than individual behaviours.  It is designed to highlight how structural inequalities play out in everyday interactions.  

Speech and communication are key areas where this happens. 

A classic example is the use of the “I” word which many women try to avoid.  As women, we use the term “we” because we feel that saying “I” is blowing our own trumpet.  Yet studies of the power dynamics of meetings and interviews, time and again, illustrate that those who use the term ‘I” – yes, more likely to be men – are seen as authoritative and with strong leadership qualities.  

This means that there are no hard or fast answers to whether Bob was mansplaining in either of the scenarios we started with.  

But help is at hand as Kim Goodwin has produced the most useful chart.  

This puts the onus back on men to question their own behaviours.  It suggests that, before they launch into any explanations about anything, they check that such an explanation is asked for or indeed wanted.

I did not need an explanation of the TEF.  Neither did I ask for one.

I am still welcoming website gurus to share their hints and knowledge.  Please explain away!

with the warmest of wishes,

christina

October 2021

If you want to follow up on anything here:  

On mansplaining. The full article is Kim Goodwin Mansplaining, explained in one chart, BBC Worklife

On essentialism.  If you wanted to read more about essentialism take a look at Anne Phillips’ paper “What’s wrong with essentialism?”